I have found myself, through some sort of unintentional subconscious effort, looking at life through the mental model of an ocean over the past few years.
We are explorers in this ocean and the ocean is filled with islands. Where your journey starts is up to the hand of fate. Some people start out on a near perfect expansive island that they never find themselves wanting to leave and others start out in open water, far from land and with no flotation device. Most of us start somewhere in between, lucky enough to be born on an island, but that island is not lush or big enough to live out the rest of our lives on. And so, once we reach a certain age or set of milestones, we must set sail in search of a more suitable island.
We don't usually see any obvious places to land when we first set sea, but the chances are very good that there's somewhere better than where we started. There are predetermined routes available though, so most of us take them. As we travel whichever paths we choose, we find more islands. Many islands are obviously bad and we skip over them, but some of them look quite nice. Unfortunately, most of the islands that look nice are not good for long term stays. Maybe it's too small, or there's not enough resources there. Maybe the island is geographically perfect, but the inhabitants are not welcoming.
The thing about this ocean of life is that it's quite scary. As you sail through open water, its easy to feel like you will never find another nice island again, not to mention an ideal one. Most people end up having long stays on islands that are not ideal because of this fear, and this is a great source of unhappiness for many. They have either settled on a bad island, or they are lost at sea.
The big trick of life that so many fall for is thinking that the bad islands are better than the sea. It makes sense. At least the bad islands give you a decently comfortable place to rest your head and allow you to feel the ground underneath your feet. At least you have a community there, even if it is not the best one for you. The big problem with the bad islands is that as long as you are on them, you are not looking for something better. Bad islands are devoid of hope.
On average, the quality of island that one is able to find depends on how much time and effort one is willing to put into sailing. And to find a truly amazing island, one that is truly your ideal place, usually requires risking being alone at sea for the rest of your life. If you want to be a true explorer and find new abundant land, you must risk not finding anything at all. That is what it takes. Most are unwilling. As I sit here and write this, I am drifting at sea and afraid. There are some pretty nice islands in my view that I could settle for if I choose to, but I don't want to at the moment. I have a feeling that there's something better out there, off-course from the currently established routes.
So for now, I coast along this deep endless ocean. I have spotted promising land masses many times on this journey, but so far, I have not been happy with what I found when I went ashore. The temptation to stay there anyway has always been strong. Sometimes I've resisted that temptation through my own will and sometimes I've been forced back into the sea kicking and screaming. All I can do is keep sailing, looking for my place, with total acceptance that the sea may be my only destiny, and maybe that's just as beautiful and fulfilling as any other fate.
That being said, I am getting pretty tired of sailing.

